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Heroic

May 16, 2025

Thirteen years ago last month, God graciously allowed my family the opportunity to join the Friendship Family. Kathryn and I loaded up our three young children and all of our earthly belongings and made the move to Raleigh. 

Today is our 27th wedding anniversary, and as we reminisce over all those years, we find ourselves reminded of how blessed we are and how much we have to be thankful for.

One year, soon after starting Friendship, for a school project, our oldest, Jeremiah, had to create a Google slide presentation about who his hero was and explaining why.

As he proudly presented his finished project to us, tears welled up in my eyes: “My Hero Dad.”

I am not one to become deeply emotional over most things, but as I read his slides, my heart welled up.

“Well he’s a hero by doing lots of things like playing with us, loving us,
being kind to us, and willing to help even when it’s hard”

It was one of those moments, you know?  Deeply impactful.

Our Temptation as Parents

Now, as I write these penultimate Weekly Words, I want to share with you what I have come to believe is the greatest danger of parenting.

Over the past 25 years as an educator, I have seen it repeated with disastrous results. While we may not always word it this way, as parents, we desire to be the hero of our children’s story.

How often do we remind them in direct and indirect ways that “It’s my way or the highway” or “Remember whose name you carry” or “Because I said so.” 

Most of our focus is on me, my, and I.  

Many parents become aggressive in this pursuit of the hero role even to the point of challenging authority on their child’s behalf or praising their child for being “an angel” or having a “sweet soul” and asking “How dare you accuse my child of being a sinner?”

I am grieved when I think of how many of those letters and emails I have received over the years.

Secretly, don’t we all long for the day when our child might stand in front of others and proudly proclaim, “My Mom or my Dad or my Parents deserve all the credit, and I wouldn’t be who I am without them” or something similar?

We often hear these words from athletes, graduates, newly married couple, and occasionally the Hollywood star. Deep within, emotions stir and tears spill out down worn and wrinkled cheeks.

The Only Worthy Hero

As Christians, we are compelled to recognize the danger that comes with this natural desire.  

We are called to make Christ and Christ alone the hero of our children’s story.

If our children one day stand and praise us but do not reflect the glory of Christ, what good is it?

Eli, the priest, from I Samuel was harshly judged by God for “honoring his children above God.” How many times I have wished to reply to emails with just those verses!

Let me implore each of us one final time to love our children, but also be fierce about challenging their sinful, rebellious nature while be petrified that we might, like Eli, lose them to a terrible, final judgement.

Of course, to do this effectively, we must begin with ourselves.  

Many parents have also made the mistake of making a great and even cruel show of dominance and force over their children who are doing nothing more than modeling what they see in the parent’s life.

We must be surrendered to His will and live righteously before Him if we ever hope for our children to.

In I Corinthians 11:1, Paul wrote “Be ye followers of me, even as I also am of Christ.” Could we confidently say the same to our children?

Thank you for your commitment to Christian education, but that is not enough. We must be committed to Christian living, submitting to authority, forgiving, reading, and meditating on God’s word, constant confession of sin, and loving Christ above all else.

How much better to be able to say:

“Our family has decided it’s God’s way or the highway.”

“Remember, you carry the name of Christ.”

“Because God’s word says so.”

Together, let’s commit to making Jesus Christ the hero of the story of our lives for He alone is worthy.

Mr. David McClain, Head of School at FCS, shares insights relating to Christian education, biblical worldview, building Christian character, and current events. Read the Weekly Words archives here.